something different.

I live where Jesus lives. I see Jesus every day. I see Jesus in the leathery brown face of the old Mayan woman with no teeth who sits on the street with a basket on her head filled with live chickens.
I see Jesus in the homeless man with one pair of ragged soiled clothes with a huge sack of trash on his back as he walks down the filthy streets barefoot.
I see Jesus in the young girl who sits against the wall on the corner of the street day after day selling gum.
I see Jesus in the man with no legs in the makeshift wood wheelchair that sits in the blaring sun in the middle of the road with a white cup hoping someone will drop some coins in.
I see Jesus in the 9 year old little girl who spends her days on her knees shining shoes with little hands that are as black as the grease that covers her.
I see Jesus in the faces of two little boys who bathe 3 times a week from a bucket of cold dirty water outside their shack.
I see Jesus in the most filthy dirty place in all of the city, with miles and miles of trash and vultures everywhere.
I see Jesus in the toddlers and young children who spend their days among this trash, that have smiles that show rotten teeth and big, round, malnourished, parasite-filled bellies.
I see Jesus in the 13 year old girl that has an infant at her breast and no shoes on her feet.
I see Jesus as the huge military trucks drive by day after day filled with military men pointing their rifles, with their fingers on the trigger, ready to shoot.
I see Jesus in the 86 year old white woman from Colorado who has spent her entire life making the Word of God known to people who can't read or write.
I see Jesus in my little puppy who's tummy was filled with parasites, whose head was covered in feces when we first brought him home.
I see Jesus in my friend who comes to my home every Sunday in chains, not able to break his addiction to drugs, or escape his hatred for religion and church.
I see Jesus in the blind man who sits on his knees in the road from morning to night singing hymns as people walk by pretending they don't see him.
I see Jesus every Tuesday and Thursday night at my kitchen table when there are three little Jehova's Witness kids sitting there soaking up everything we say to them.
I see Jesus when I walk by the Paca where my friend sits for 10 hours a day reading his bible and hoping someone will come buy some old used clothes from him.
I see Jesus when I heard that a young girl gave birth and dumped her baby in the trash on the streets hoping it would die.
I see Jesus when I hear about missionaries and foreigners getting slaughtered because of their white skin or their faith in Christ.
I see Jesus when I hear the chants and smell the incense of the Mayan people pleading their case to the god of the mountains.

This is Guatemala and I live in Coban. I live where Jesus lives. I live in a place where outside people take a look and their mouths drop open in disgust. I live in a place where people breathe in and snarl their noses at the smell of human feces and urine covering the sidewalks. I live in a place where people gasp at the fact that there are babies having babies and little kids laboring in the streets and the in the fields. I live in a place where you can't walk out at night and bars on your windows aren't enough. I look out my bedroom window and see big rocks that have been placed on pieces of tin to hold the roofs down on the shanty one-bedroom shacks that house ten people.

You don't drink the water here, if there is any water. You don't mind the smells that flow through the pipes and into your bathroom, if you're even lucky enough to have a bathroom. You don't mind the cockroaches and the spiders in your home, if you're lucky enough to even have a home.

You're heart hurts when you listen to foreigners scoffing at the condition of things in your country, cursing it, and cursing it's people. It hurts when you hear people making fun of things that would be luxuries to 90% of the people here.
Jesus' heart hurts when we rich people see the things we see and then pretend we never saw them. Jesus' heart hurts when the homeless man lies down in the cold rain to take a rest from walking on his feet that are covered in fungus.
Jesus' heart hurts when we rich people know the things we know and then we forget them because they make us uncomfortable.
Jesus' heart hurts when the four year old boy's parents decide not to come get him that day and he spends the night in the landfill with the dogs and the vultures.

Jesus hasn't forgotten this place. I know because every evening the sun sets against the mountains coloring the sky every shade of beautiful that exists. I know because here it is Spring year round and the flowers never stop blooming. I know because we spend days in the clouds, literally in the clouds. I know because the kids smile and they speak the name of Jesus and crazy homeless men stand in the streets and tell you "God bless you" as you walk by. I know because the shoeshiner stands in my kitchen and quotes verse after verse of God's word. I know because everytime I see all these things that make you cringe, I see Jesus. And I know because I know Jesus and Jesus asked me to live here.

That is why Jesus is here. That is why this is the place I most want to be. I have never been anywhere where I have ever been so close to Jesus. And as close to Jesus as possible is right where I desire to be. I live in the most beautiful place in the world.